What to expect in Lithuania?

Up until recently, this was a country to which Norwegians and others were sending aid. People would organize collections of used clothing, canned food and various other items and send it in busses to Lithuania. No offense to the many volunteers that for various reasons participated in organising shipments of aid to dilapidated Lithuanian orphanages and troubled Lithuanian bus companies, but little thought were given to how such things would affect Norwegians view of Lithuanian society. Norwegians still tend to think of Lithuania as some kind of backwater where there is a shortage of everything, and where your old socks probably would be greatly appreciated once you are done with them. Along with all the old busses that no longer meet Norwegian requirements and consequently have to be taken out of service anyway. And if you can spare some old toys and some food, there will always be plenty of people there in desperate need of such items as well. Images such as these have been common in Norwegian media for over 20 years, this one from December 2013:



For full article: http://www.eub.no/article/20131203/UNKNOWN/131209982

 

People with consciences should even send a Bible of two, since people in the west were told that everyone in the Soviet Union had to denounce God and turn their churches into warehouses, dwellings for pigs, or structures with other profane purposes. I myself grew up with spine chilling stories from Sunday school where missionaries would come and tell the children about how they had recently returned from the dangerous Soviet Union, where people (much like the trolls in Norwegian folklore) hated everything associated with Christianity. These brave missionaries had risked their lives smuggling illegal Bibles in secret compartments in their cars, which they later distributed among the now largely pagan soviet population. If you are interested, you can read all about it in this book:

 

Available from this site: www.lundeforlag.no Broder Andreas is internationally known as Brother Andrew, and his organisation Open Doors still exists today. Nowadays they probably have their hands full fighting persecution of Christians on a whole different scale than what was the case in the Soviet Union.

So who lives in this godless country where there is a shortage of everything? Well, Norwegians seemingly got the answer to this question after all EU-affiliated countries opened their borders to all other European countries that had signed the correct treaty. This gave a very welcome boost to many hard working criminals struggling to make ends meet in Lithuania. For various reasons it made good sense for Lithuanian criminals to specialize in Norway. It was really not that far away, and the potential for profit was enormous. Mostly in the drug business. Sadly, the plants used for cocaine and heroin production cannot be successfully cultivated in Lithuania, but the country does offer access to a vast selection of chemicals. From these a crafty criminal can easily cook up some drug that will earn good money on the Norwegian market, as this example of Lithuanian home cooking shows:

This picture was taken by Lithuanian police. Published in one of the major Norwegian newspapers at http://www.dagbladet.no/2013/01/30/nyheter/litauen/innenriks/kriminalitet/kripos/25505979/

 

 Lithuanians are also reputed to have a passion for gardening, and criminals seem to be no exception. This one has found a way to combine his passion with his life of crime, and set up this beautiful but rather illegal plantation at home:

 

The police are eager to discuss gardening with this man, and will probably do so once he is done serving his unrelated prison sentence in Finland. According to http://www.dagbladet.no/2013/01/30/nyheter/litauen/innenriks/kriminalitet/kripos/25505979/

 

The newspaper articles informing Norwegians about Lithuanian criminals also commonly mention that these receive assistance from ordinary migrant workers. This makes it easier to take the more convenient assumption that most Lithuanians are more or less criminals. Since many of them also work in construction and consequently often own spacious cars, it is not uncommon for Norwegians to picture a Lithuanian car returning from a visit home as being packed somewhat like this:

 

his one and a number of similar images are available at http://www.glomdalen.no/nyheter/article6667389.ece

 

 Another common way for Lithuanians to make their way into Norwegian news also involves driving, but is more related to the condition of the vehicle rather than its contents:

 

http://www.tv2.no/underholdning/broom/dette-kostet-ham-en-maanedsloenn-3680748.html

If we take all this that I have learned about Lithuania and Lithuanians from the media and mix it with the following quick facts I found on the Internet before leaving:

• Lithuanians were the last people to accept Christianity in Europe, and are fiercely proud of it.
• Lithuanians allegedly kill themselves more often than any other people in the world.
• Lithuanians are among the skinniest people in the developed world, despite the fact that their national cuisine is a largely based on pork and potatoes.
• The most famous Lithuanian piece of literature is about alcoholism under a maple tree.
• Lithuanians have the highest mortality rate in traffic in the entire EU-area. Which must be said to be quite an achievement, since Poland is also in the EU.

…we get the following conclusion:
 

I was going to a godless country of reckless drivers where most of the population lacked everyday essentials and consequently often resort to lives of crime. Now, who wouldn`t want to visit THAT place?

Recommended related post: How to pack for Lithuania